Study in Human Nature

I don't know why this continues to surprise me, because I've seen it so many times before, but I'm always shocked when it happens.

This afternoon a four-year-old boy had a seizure which put him into cardiac arrest.  As the helicopter was in flight to take the child to the hospital, his heart sick mother turned to Google+ on social media and asked for prayers.  She told people that didn't believe in a higher power to please just scroll on down.  She is not of my faith, but I know that God answers ALL prayers.  As a mother, I felt her pain.  I instantly bowed my head and said a prayer for this child, his mother, and all those who loved them.

On completion of my prayer, I scrolled through the comments.  In just an hour from her original post, there were 283 comments, 200 people had +1 (or liked) the post, and 67 people had forwarded the post for their followers to read and pray.  As I write this post, people are continuing to comment and pray.  Prayers came from many faiths--Christian and Muslim.  Some who don't believe in a higher power, left kind thoughts for a speedy recovery.

The reason for my shock:  There were several comments left for this grieving mother expressing the sentiment that instead of praying to some imaginary man in the sky, she should be hoping the doctors had learned their skills appropriately.  I am shocked at the heartlessness of those comments--especially since this mother had specifically asked that those who were not believers just scroll past.  Those on social media who insist on kicking a man who is down are just cruel people.  There is a time and a place for religious debate.  This was not the time, nor the place.  This was a grieving mother in a plea for support.  The longer I live in "civilization," the more I wonder how "civilized" we really are becoming.  All I can do is note the numbers of people who left kind messages and hope that by the end of the day, those messages far outweigh the unkind words.

Come Listen To A Prophet's Voice

Picture from here:  

http://www.lds.org/?lang=eng

Humility has never been one of my strong points.  I take a lot of things for granted.  I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon).  We believe that Jesus Christ is the head of the Church, and through His guidance we are led by living prophets and apostles, just as the Church was led when Christ was on the earth.  As a kid, I used to watch LDS Conference on television (we only received one session on television in those days), and it never occurred to me how blessed I was to be listening to living prophets giving counsel.  The older I get, the more appreciation I have for that counsel.  What a marvelous opportunity it is to live on the earth at a time when we have living prophets!  Technology has advanced to the degree that we can live stream all sessions of conference, and have the videos to replay within hours.  The printed version is available later so that we can painstakingly study, highlight, and ponder the written word.

There is always so much to take into our hearts each conference that it is difficult to pick just one thing from the conference six months ago to share.  However, there is something that I've thought about often over the last six months.  The President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, President Thomas S. Monson, who we believe to be a prophet of God, said the following:

"We must be vigilant in a world which has moved so far from that which is spiritual.  It is essential that we reject anything that does not conform to our standards, refusing in the process to surrender that which we desire most:  eternal life in the kingdom of God.  The storms will still beat at our doors from time to time, for they are an inescapable part of our existence in mortality.  We, however, will be far better equipped to deal with them, to learn from them, and to overcome them if we have the gospel at our core and the love of the Savior in our hearts."  

President Monson goes on to counsel that if we want to be in the world but not of the world, it is important that we communicate with our Heavenly Father through prayer.  This is something that I've given much thought to over the past six months.  I struggle every day with things all around me that are inappropriate at best and outright vulgar at worst.  I recently wrote a blog post about part of this struggle here.  The one thing that I've been able to take comfort in is President Monson's counsel to communicate with my Heavenly Father.  Prayer has indeed been a great comfort to me and has helped me to muddle my way through the mud.

General Conference is coming our way again Saturday, March 31, 2012, and Sunday, April 1, 2012.  Conference can be viewed on cable and satellite systems, as well as live streamed here:  As usual, I'm starved to hear the word of the Lord through our living prophets and apostles, as well as others who sought for inspiration in preparing for this conference. I pray that I'll be in tune with the Spirit and hear the message that my Heavenly Father wishes me to hear.

I hope you will join with me in hearing the counsel of the Lord.

Christmas Talk for Church 12-25-11

This talk was given by me in Sacrament Meeting (Worship Service), Sacramento First Ward,  The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Christmas Day, December 25, 2011.

The topic the Bishop gave me was "What would you tell all your children if they were here today?"  One of my children is here today with her family.  I was given a similar challenge in August of 1994 by a couple of writers, Bob Greene and D. G. Fulford, and at that time I wrote down a few thoughts which I will read today.  A few lines of what I'm about to read were published in this little book, Notes on the Kitchen Table--my five minutes of fame.

To My Children, My Grandchildren, My Posterity for Generations to Come:

I’ve tried to live my life as an example to others.  I’ve tried to raise my children to be good people.  I’ve tried to be a good person myself.  I’ve tried to be a good wife.  But I’ve made some mistakes.  I’m not perfect.

If there is one thing I’ve learned in this life, it’s that you have to be forgiving of others, as well as forgiving of yourself.  If you can’t forgive yourself, how can you expect others to forgive you?

Religion is a very personal thing.  We all have to find our Heavenly Father in our own way, in our own time.  I testify to all who read this note, that you do have a Heavenly Father.  Your Heavenly Father loves you, and wants only the best for you.  He is close by when you need Him.  Pray always.  Pray with a sincere heart.  Pray in the name of Jesus Christ.  Listen for the answers to your prayers.  It has been said that prayer is like a telephone conversation; it works two ways.  If you don’t listen, you’ll never hear an answer.

I know with all my heart and soul that my Heavenly Father loves me.  I know that my family will be together after this life.  I long to meet my ancestors who passed through this life before me.  I long to hold in my arms the baby I lost.  I know I’ll do that.  I have not a doubt in my mind!

Please look at my life as a whole; don’t pick it apart and criticize my weaknesses.  I have made mistakes, many of them.  I’ve done things and said things that hurt people.  I know that.  Please know that it was not intentional.  I never intentionally went out to hurt another person in my life.  Please forgive me for any weaknesses, and for anything I’ve done which may have hurt you, or someone else.

Have courage to live your lives in these times.  These are not easy times.  It is not long before Jesus Christ will again come to this earth.  The way is being prepared.  It is said that our Heavenly Father saved his strongest children to come to earth in the last days.  I know my children are stronger than I am.  I’ve seen that time and time again.  I’ve watched them endure many things that I would not have been able to endure.  Don’t be afraid of what is to come; welcome it with open arms.

Live each day to the fullest, with great joy!  Don’t brood over hard times—I’ve done that at times, and can tell you that it doesn’t do anyone any good. Watch the simple things in life.  Don’t be too busy to watch a sunrise, or a sunset.  Watch a mother bird feed her babies in the next.  Spend time watching an ant colony bury its dead.  More importantly, share these things with your children!  While you share these things with them, watch your children!  See their faces light up when they discover that ice cream melts when exposed to heat.  Watch their eyes as they pet a new puppy.  Be there when they take their first steps, and when they drive a car for the first time.  Don’t miss a moment of their growing up years!  Teach them to pray.  Listen to them when they talk to you!

Always retain a sense of humor.  If you can laugh, you’ll have a wonderful life.  Never be afraid to laugh at yourself.  Don’t take yourself too seriously, or those around you.

Set goals for yourself, but reasonable goals.  Don’t overwhelm yourself with trying to be perfect.  Take one step at a time, then build on each step.  When you stumble, pick yourself up and go on.  When you think you can’t pick yourself up, pray for help.  He’ll be there, or he’ll provide someone in your life to help you.  Remember that your Heavenly Father often helps you through the arms of others.  Reach out to people.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help.  Don’t be afraid to love.

I’ve heard it said that our Heavenly Father never hands us a trial that we can’t handle.  He knows our limitations and our abilities.  Have faith that He knows how strong we are, or how weak we are.

Learn from past experiences.  If it didn’t work last time, it won’t work this time.  If it did work last time, don’t change the method just for the sake of change.

Be kind to yourself.  You can’t be kind to others until you learn to love yourself.

Seek out your Heavenly Father.  He’s there for the asking.  He loves you, Jesus loves you, and I love you.

All my love,

Mom

                                                                                    August 10, 1994

A Time to Forgive

It's almost Christmas, and that always makes me step back and evaluate where I am in the process of life, who I am, and what I'm becoming.  It's about the analysis of my progression, I guess.  I'm 57 years old.  There's been a lot of living in that time, and a lot of time to get into trouble.  Trouble seems to be my middle name.  As we walk through life, hopefully we learn a few things.  One of the things I've learned is that there is no way you can please everyone.  There is always going to be someone who doesn't understand your intentions, doesn't like what you do, or just plain doesn't like you.  That's okay.  What matters is that you never intentionally hurt someone, that try to make amends to those who you unintentionally hurt, and that you forgive those who misunderstand.

It has not been easy for me to learn to forgive.  Actually, I've spent my whole life attempting to learn the principle.  I'm getting better, but I have not completely mastered it.

On January 3, 1971, Elder Richard L. Evans had this to say about forgiveness in a broadcast of Music and the Spoken Word:

"Once a year—or oftener—all of us should clear out the clutter, the things that are useless to us, that get in our way and add confusion to our lives and impede our progress.  But even oftener we should look at our unforgiving grudges, and not nurse them or hold to them or keep them alive.  An unresolved grudge gnaws at our hearts, disturbs our peace, and is a burden we would well be rid of.  God will forgive whom he will, but of us it is required to forgive.  We should forgive not only for what it does for others, but as a favor to ourselves, because forgiving relieves us of a lingering uneasiness inside ourselves.  Oh, what easing of our relationships with loved ones, and with others also, with a lightening of our own lives, as we learn to forgive!"

The older I get, the more I realize how short our time is here on earth.  The kinds of things that would infuriate me in my youth don't seem to bother me anymore.  Little injustices just don't seem to matter.  There was a time when I could really hold a grudge.  I don't anymore.  I get angry.  I get hurt.  I get over it.  There is just so little time for drama, and I don't have the energy for it.  What good is it?  Does it serve any purpose?

We're coming to the end of a year and the beginning of a new one.  It is the time of year we think about the Christ child, His life, and the atonement.  What better time to throw out the meanness in our hearts.  Bitterness breeds more bitterness and even hatred.  Forgiveness breeds forgiveness and kindness.

Roderick J. Linton said in The Forgiving Heart, April 1993 Ensign:

"Forgiveness is a personal attribute, not just a decision we make from time to time when we feel we should.  To have a forgiving heart is to see the world in a different light.  It is to forsake the tendency to judge, condemn, exclude, or hate any human soul.  A forgiving heart seeks to love and to be patient with imperfection.  The forgiving heart understands that we are all in need of the atonement of Jesus Christ.

A forgiving heart is one of the most Christlike virtues we can possess.  If we have a forgiving heart, our very nature will be kind, patient, long-suffering, and charitable.  Forgiveness plants and nourishes the seeds of Christlike love in both the giver and the receiver.  Indeed, forgiveness, in its fullest expression, is synonymous with charity, the pure love of Christ."

There is our challenge.  Will it be the status quo, or shall we stand a little taller?  Will we make forgiveness our own personal attribute?  Will we learn to have a forgiving heart?  Having a forgiving heart takes effort.  It isn't something that comes naturally to most people.  How much effort are we willing to devote to have a forgiving heart?  I would venture to say that probably the most important thing we can hope to learn in this life is the principle of forgiveness.  It is attainable.  We just need to put forth the effort.  Through prayer, we can have His help.  I publicly promise this day that I will do my best to stand a little taller.

Sometimes the Answer is "No"

Answers to prayers are sometimes no. We may never know why Heavenly Father says no, but sometimes we get a glimpse.

When Danny and I were raising our children, we talked about how wonderful it would be to raise them in a small town where life would be a little simpler, and hopefully they would have fewer temptations. Danny began applying for all Caltrans landscaping and maintenance jobs that became available in small towns. There was one particular interview that was quite promising. The kids and I took a road trip with Danny to this interview. We dropped him off at the interview and we checked out the little town. When we picked him up later, I quizzed him about the questions that were asked, and the answers that he gave. The more he told me about this interview, the more excited we both became. He gave the perfect interview. We just knew he had the job. In fact, I was so sure that he had aced that interview that I came home and cleaned my oven for the move -- which admittedly is something I never do!

In the end, he didn't get the job. Danny's score was within .01% of another applicant's score. Ultimately, it was the foreman's call, and he chose the applicant with whom he could commute.

We were devastated. It had seemed like this job was the answer to prayers. We couldn't figure out why this had not gone the way we wanted and expected it to go.

Two years later, there was a devastating earthquake in that little town, Coalinga, California. The neighborhood where we would have lived was completely leveled to the ground.

Sometimes, it is best not to question Heavenly Father's reasons. Sometimes it is best to just trust that he knows what is best for us.