Christmas Talk for Church 12-25-11

This talk was given by me in Sacrament Meeting (Worship Service), Sacramento First Ward,  The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Christmas Day, December 25, 2011.

The topic the Bishop gave me was "What would you tell all your children if they were here today?"  One of my children is here today with her family.  I was given a similar challenge in August of 1994 by a couple of writers, Bob Greene and D. G. Fulford, and at that time I wrote down a few thoughts which I will read today.  A few lines of what I'm about to read were published in this little book, Notes on the Kitchen Table--my five minutes of fame.

To My Children, My Grandchildren, My Posterity for Generations to Come:

I’ve tried to live my life as an example to others.  I’ve tried to raise my children to be good people.  I’ve tried to be a good person myself.  I’ve tried to be a good wife.  But I’ve made some mistakes.  I’m not perfect.

If there is one thing I’ve learned in this life, it’s that you have to be forgiving of others, as well as forgiving of yourself.  If you can’t forgive yourself, how can you expect others to forgive you?

Religion is a very personal thing.  We all have to find our Heavenly Father in our own way, in our own time.  I testify to all who read this note, that you do have a Heavenly Father.  Your Heavenly Father loves you, and wants only the best for you.  He is close by when you need Him.  Pray always.  Pray with a sincere heart.  Pray in the name of Jesus Christ.  Listen for the answers to your prayers.  It has been said that prayer is like a telephone conversation; it works two ways.  If you don’t listen, you’ll never hear an answer.

I know with all my heart and soul that my Heavenly Father loves me.  I know that my family will be together after this life.  I long to meet my ancestors who passed through this life before me.  I long to hold in my arms the baby I lost.  I know I’ll do that.  I have not a doubt in my mind!

Please look at my life as a whole; don’t pick it apart and criticize my weaknesses.  I have made mistakes, many of them.  I’ve done things and said things that hurt people.  I know that.  Please know that it was not intentional.  I never intentionally went out to hurt another person in my life.  Please forgive me for any weaknesses, and for anything I’ve done which may have hurt you, or someone else.

Have courage to live your lives in these times.  These are not easy times.  It is not long before Jesus Christ will again come to this earth.  The way is being prepared.  It is said that our Heavenly Father saved his strongest children to come to earth in the last days.  I know my children are stronger than I am.  I’ve seen that time and time again.  I’ve watched them endure many things that I would not have been able to endure.  Don’t be afraid of what is to come; welcome it with open arms.

Live each day to the fullest, with great joy!  Don’t brood over hard times—I’ve done that at times, and can tell you that it doesn’t do anyone any good. Watch the simple things in life.  Don’t be too busy to watch a sunrise, or a sunset.  Watch a mother bird feed her babies in the next.  Spend time watching an ant colony bury its dead.  More importantly, share these things with your children!  While you share these things with them, watch your children!  See their faces light up when they discover that ice cream melts when exposed to heat.  Watch their eyes as they pet a new puppy.  Be there when they take their first steps, and when they drive a car for the first time.  Don’t miss a moment of their growing up years!  Teach them to pray.  Listen to them when they talk to you!

Always retain a sense of humor.  If you can laugh, you’ll have a wonderful life.  Never be afraid to laugh at yourself.  Don’t take yourself too seriously, or those around you.

Set goals for yourself, but reasonable goals.  Don’t overwhelm yourself with trying to be perfect.  Take one step at a time, then build on each step.  When you stumble, pick yourself up and go on.  When you think you can’t pick yourself up, pray for help.  He’ll be there, or he’ll provide someone in your life to help you.  Remember that your Heavenly Father often helps you through the arms of others.  Reach out to people.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help.  Don’t be afraid to love.

I’ve heard it said that our Heavenly Father never hands us a trial that we can’t handle.  He knows our limitations and our abilities.  Have faith that He knows how strong we are, or how weak we are.

Learn from past experiences.  If it didn’t work last time, it won’t work this time.  If it did work last time, don’t change the method just for the sake of change.

Be kind to yourself.  You can’t be kind to others until you learn to love yourself.

Seek out your Heavenly Father.  He’s there for the asking.  He loves you, Jesus loves you, and I love you.

All my love,

Mom

                                                                                    August 10, 1994

They Are Too Innocent

There was a picture on Facebook the other day of a baby who has heart problems.  Those close to the family were asking for others to fast and pray on behalf of the baby, the family, and the medical staff who will be performing surgery shortly.  I don't know the family, but immediately my heart went out to them, as it always does when I hear of little ones suffering.  We have been there.

My first pregnancy was very difficult.  I gained 80 pounds, and it was not because I was eating.  As a matter of fact, about the only things I could consistently keep down for nine months was Jello and raisins.  Meanwhile, the doctor was yelling at me for eating "fried foods."  Yeah, right.   Whatever!  If it had not been my first pregnancy, I would have known something was wrong.  Molly would kick me until I would double over in pain.  I didn't know that was not normal.  Two weeks past (the doctor's) due date (only three days past mine), my water broke, and it was green.  I didn't know that was not normal either, but soon found out that meant trouble.

To make a very long story short, Molly had a lung cyst the size of a baseball.  Unfortunately, only one in 100,000 babies has this problem, and the symptoms are the same for a diaphragmatic hernia, so she was originally misdiagnosed.  A diaphragmatic hernia is caused by the lack of a diaphragm so the bowels move up into the lungs.  They go in, put everything where it belongs, and then try to form a diaphragm.  They originally gave her a 50/50 chance of survival.  Before she was 12 hours old, she underwent two separate surgeries.  They took her in for surgery originally for the diaphragmatic hernia, but after five hours of surgery, came back and told us that she had the lung cyst.  She was still under the anesthesia, and they were about to do the second surgery.  They told us that they might have to remove part or all of one lung, but that the other lung would probably grow to twice the size to compensate.  It turned out that they were able to remove the cyst without removing any of the lung.  The recovery process was long and hard, but she is now my rocket scientist with a family of her own.

Hannah was my most healthy child, but when she was four months old they almost put her back in the hospital because she wasn't gaining weight (which was a problem with all my children).  They waited one more week, and then she began to pick up a little.  There is actually a note in Hannah's medical chart that says, "Nonthriving child; good mom."  (In other words, don't call Child Protective Services.)  Like Molly, Hannah too survived, has a career and a family of her own.

After Hannah, I had a miscarriage.  I wasn't very far along, but I still think about that baby.  I wonder if we'll have the opportunity in heaven to raise the baby.  We don't know, because it is one of those things that Heavenly Father has not yet revealed.  I hope I'm prepared for the answer when it comes.

I was borderline diabetic when I was pregnant with Ezra, so he was born addicted to sugar.  I wasn't even allowed to hold him when he was born.  They ripped him away and began pumping sugar down him.  He was followed by an endocrinologist until he was 15 years old because of his odd growth patterns.  He was short for a very long time.  There was a point where they wanted to give him growth hormones, and we said no.  I'm so glad we did, because he finally caught up.  If we had given him hormones, he might have been eight feet tall!  Ezra also grew to adulthood, and he also has a family of his own.

I had the flu when I was pregnant with Kaylonnie, and the amniotic fluid was contaminated.  When she was born, instead of taking a large breath and getting all the fluid out of her lungs, she took a tiny breath and left most of the contaminated fluid in her lungs.  We almost lost her to pneumonia.  I had never heard of a newborn with pneumonia.  I came home from the hospital on Mother's Day, leaving Kaylonnie in the Nursery Intensive Care Unit.  Kaylonnie is a fine young woman--now 21 years old and will soon be off to serve a mission in Brazil.

These little babies are much too innocent and precious to have to deal with all these problems.  There were obviously some lessons that we needed to learn as parents.  Someday, one of the first questions I'm going to ask Heavenly Father is if there might have been a better way to teach me those lessons without my children having to deal with all that.  I know there must be a reason that I can't now comprehend.

So what did I learn from all this?  I learned that my marriage can withstand anything if my husband and I stick together through thick and thin.  I learned that every tiny baby is a fragile and precious gift from God.  I learned to rely on Heavenly Father when there is nothing that I can do on my own.  I learned that life is not easy, but well worth it.

Guest Post: The Lord's Law of Health

My lovely daughter, Kaylonnie, is my guest blogger today.  She is waiting for her 21st birthday in May, and more importantly, will be submitting her papers shortly to serve a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons).  More than any other prospective missionary I've ever known, Kaylonnie as put everything on the table to become a missionary.  She had huge obstacles to overcome in order to be healthy enough to serve a mission.  She has worked very hard to overcome those obstacles, and this post is a testament to her hard work.  I'm sure you'll enjoy this thoughtful post as much as I did.

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Growing up LDS (Mormon), I heard teachers say almost every Sunday that they were grateful for their opportunity to teach a lesson that Sunday because they had learned so much from their preparation and felt that the topic they were assigned to teach was exactly what they needed to carry them through the week or get them through a particular trial.  I often used to wonder if that is something that teachers just said, or if they really felt that way.  I have learned the last few months that very often, we need to teach certain gospel principles more than the students in the class need to hear them.  Heavenly Father knows us.  He knows our strengths and weaknesses.  He knows what we are committed to, and how committed we are, to all of our thoughts and endeavors.  He knows how we learn and feel the Spirit, and what lessons we still need to learn.

Recently, I mentioned to one of my best friends that the next Relief Society lesson I have to teach is "The Lord's Law of Health."  He remarked about how simple that would be and began to list the do's and don'ts of the Word of Wisdom.  As Mormons, we do follow the Word of Wisdom and abstain from alcohol, tea, coffee, tobacco, and illegal substances.  We are also counseled to eat whole grains, fruits, and vegetables, and to eat meat sparingly.  But, the Lord's law of health is so much more than a list of "forbidden fruits."  We have been given the Word of Wisdom and other good health guidelines to help protect one of the most precious gifts Heavenly Father has given us, our bodies.

Our bodies are literally the temples that house our spirits.  The Lord's law of health encourages our minds and bodies.  For the first two decades of my life, I did not truly live the Lord's law of health. I can honestly say that I had never had any desire to partake of coffee, alcohol, drugs, or anything of the sort.  But, by not exercising self control, overindulging, and completely ignoring my physical health, I was damaging my temple.

The Word of Wisdom was given for the weakest of Saints, and I am definitely one of them.  I now know that the Lord's law of health is more than a list of do's and don'ts.  It is a way of life that shows our commitment to the Lord.  Today, I commit to continue to protect, honor, and respect my body as a token of my affection for myself, my family, and my Heavenly Father.  I know that as we live the law of health, we are blessed with strong bodies, alert minds, and joyous lives.

Doctrine and Covenants, Section 89

1.  A Word of Wisdom, for the benefit of the council of high priests, assembled in Kirtland, and the church, and also the saints in Zion—

2.  To be sent greeting; not by commandment or constraint, but by revelation and the word of wisdom, showing forth the order and will of God in the temporal salvation of all saints in the last days—

3.  Given for a principle with promise, adapted to the capacity of the weak and the weakest of all saints, who are or can be called saints.

4.  Behold, verily, thus saith the Lord unto you: In consequence of evils and designs which do and will exist in the hearts of conspiring men in the last days, I have warned you, and forewarn you, by giving unto you this word of wisdom by revelation—

5.  That inasmuch as any man drinketh wine or strong drink among you, behold it is not good, neither meet in the sight of your Father, only in assembling yourselves together to offer up your sacraments before him.

6.  And, behold, this should be wine, yea  pure wine of the grape of the vine, of your own make.

7.  And, again, strong drinks are not for the belly, but for the washing of your bodies.

8.  And again, tobacco is not for the body, neither for the belly, and is not good for man, but is an herb for bruises and all sick cattle, to be used with judgment and skill.

9.  And again, hot drinks are not for the body or belly.

10.  And again, verily I say unto you, all wholesome herbs God hath ordained for the constitution, nature, and use of man—

11.  Every herb in the season thereof, and every fruit in the season thereof; all these to be used with prudence and thanksgiving.

12.  Yea, flesh also of beasts and of the fowls of the air, I, the Lord, have ordained for the use of man with thanksgiving; nevertheless they are to be used sparingly;

13.  And it is pleasing unto me that they should not be used, only in times of winter, or of cold, or famine.

14.  All grain is ordained for the use of man and of beasts, to be the staff of life, not only for man but for the beasts of the field, and the fowls of heaven, and all wild animals that run or creep on the earth;

15.  And these hath God made for the use of man only in times of famine and excess of hunger.

16.  All grain is good for the food of man; as also the fruit of the vine; that which yieldeth fruit, whether in the ground or above the ground—

17.  Nevertheless, wheat for man, and corn for the ox, and oats for the horse, and rye for the fowls and for swine, and for all beasts of the field, and barley for all useful animals, and for mild drinks, as also other grain.

18.  And all saints who remember to keep and do these sayings, walking in obedience to the commandments, shall receive health in their navel and marrow to their bones;

19.  And shall find wisdom and great treasures of knowledge, even hidden treasures;

20.  And shall run and not be weary, and shall walk and not faint.

21.  And I, the Lord, give unto them a promise, that the destroying angel shall pass by them, as the children of Israel, and not slay them. Amen.